What Does One Wear When Showing a Million-Dollar House?
Not My Underwear - Image Borrowed from istock
My very first day in real estate, I split my pants.
Not a polite little seam situation. Not a “maybe no one noticed” moment.
I’m talking a full, dramatic, up-the-middle rip.
And what the world saw—what the buyer saw, what the neighbor walking the dog definitely saw—was a proud display of pink, full-coverage, absolutely no-nonsense granny panties.
Let me explain.
I was living paycheck to paycheck. The black “professional” pants I was wearing were secondhand. They had that thrift-store confidence: Looks great! Probably fine!
They were not fine.
I bent down to unlock the door. RIP.
There is no training for that moment. No class called Maintaining Professionalism While Your Dignity Leaves the Property.
So, I did what any brand-new agent would do.
I backed into walls.
I leaned against kitchen islands.
I showed that entire house like a human piece of furniture.
And that, friends, is how my real estate career began.
Back then, my wardrobe strategy was simple:
• Black pants (structural integrity: uncertain)
• Comfortable flats
• Anything that didn’t wrinkle in the car
• Undergarments chosen strictly for durability, not presentation
I was so practical that I didn’t buy proper professional clothes until my bank account reached a reliable threshold that did include overdraft protection.
That took years.
And even now, I am not fancy. I am functional.
Real estate is not really a fashion job. It’s a job where you might be crawling through an attic at 10 a.m. and walking acreage in mud by noon.
Then one day you realize…
You’re showing million-dollar homes.
And a new question appears:
What does one wear when showing a luxury property?
Because these homes have cameras.
Not just doorbells. I’m talking full security systems.
Somewhere, a seller is absolutely watching the footage, thinking:
Is that the agent?
Is she wearing flats?
Did she use my powder bath?
Meanwhile, I’m thinking:
Don’t scuff the floors.
Don’t touch anything white.
Please don’t say anything stupid.
If Instagram is to be believed, luxury agents wear:
• Sky-high heels
• Tailored pencil skirts
• Crisp blazers
• Designer handbags
• Hair that defies humidity and gravity
That is not happening over here.
Because luxury homes still come with:
• Attics
• Crawlspaces
• Long driveways
• Hills
• And buyers who want to “just take a quick walk around the property,” which turns into a half-mile hike across farmland.
Try doing that in stilettos.
So here’s my actual million-dollar showing outfit:
• Dark sturdy jeans (back seam intact)
• A durable shirt
• A jacket or vest with lots of pockets…because, well…keys.
• Comfortable flat shoes I can move in
• Minimal everything
The goal is simple: look polished, move freely, and avoid any situation that could become a tragic wardrobe malfunction.
Because once you’ve shown a house while strategically leaning against furniture for structural support, you don’t take chances.
And yes, the cameras are always in the back of your mind.
Which means:
• No commentary about the price
• No dramatic reactions
• And absolutely no adjusting your clothing in a way that suggests things are going wrong back there
Some lessons stay with you forever.
Every now and then, I’ll be walking through a stunning home—custom lighting, floors that cost more than my first car, closets the size of my college apartment—and I’ll think about that first day.
The post-college thrift-store pants.
The pink granny panties.
The silent panic.
And honestly? That version of me would be very relieved to know we now perform a full seam inspection before every showing.
So what should you wear when showing a million-dollar house?
Something comfortable.
Something professional.
Something that lets you move, climb, crouch, and survive Alabama humidity.
And most importantly…
Something with very strong stitching.
Trust me. Experience is the best tailor.
